When a couple first see me for counseling, I have them complete my Personal History Questionnaire, which systematically reviews many of the significant events of their past, and some of their deepest emotional feelings. After I have read through their answers, and have had a chance to ask them questions that their answers suggest, in many ways I come to know them better than their spouse knows them. And that's very sad. In less than three hours I can know more about a person than the one who has lived with him or her for a decade or more.

I don't want you to be as ignorant of each other as so many of my clients were when they first came to see me. I want you to know as much as possible about each other. So I am offering you the same Personal History Questionnaire that I created to help me get to know my clients.

Make two copies of this questionnaire, so that you can both get to know each other better. Leave nothing out and be willing to pursue any line of inquiry that will help you better understand each other's past.

Please note: You will need Adobe® Acrobat® Reader installed on your computer to view the PHQ. The software program is FREE. Simply click on the "Get Acrobat Reader" image below and begin the download process. Once the program is installed, come back to this page to view the PHQ.